Tuesday, August 17, 2010

changed sites

Hey i no longer use this blog anymore.... i liked wordpress.com better... so my new site is there.....


Wednesday, August 11, 2010

I am my Beloved's and He is mine.

This weekend was in a word: amazing. It has actually ben hard to explain to people what happened this weekend. There was so much being spoken; God didn't really stop talking the entire time. I love it. I can really only explain what He taught me. Some things were intimate, some were really open. I'll do my best to convey His words here.

He loves us. Yes, I'm aware you know this. It's an intelligent concept and yet the past generations of Christians have managed to completely over look it. It's why Christians today struggle so much with performance. He loves you right now, right where you are spiritually, physically, and emotionally. He doesn't need you to attain any other levels, or any other accomplishments. I don't need to understand His word more or minister to other people more. He loves me right now the same as He will in 20 years. He wants me to walk in the fullness of the ministries He has for me right now. He loves me. Maybe for some of you this is an easy idea. For some of us, though, I know it can be hard. That just sitting here, rotting in this chair, He loves me, just as much as when I'm in church worshipping Him.

Now with His love comes the truth that He sees me, through Christ, as who I am in the resurrected Kingdom. That girl who walks fully in her gifts and is so full of her Father's love that it shoots out of her like beams of light. That is how He sees me. Full and perfect, completely a  person, in the light of His Son. I know this is crazy. I know you'd love to think God is practical: He can see all my brokenness and faults, He knows who I really am. Beloved, NO. You think you know who you are, but God does not view you through your eyes (Can i get an amen??) And He's dying (or more literally died) for you to see you through His eyes.

Here, let me use a different metaphor: Ya know when you're in love, yes, right at the beginning when all you see are stars, rainbows, and sunshine? You don't see that persons imperfections or flaws, you're completely oblivious to their tendency towards road rage or even their in-the-closet addictions to ______. They are exciting, amazing, and the relationship gives you life, breath, and energy. (ahhhh this just has me giddy thinking about it) Ok, so now that I have you grinning.... That is how the Father feels about you right now. And in 2 yrs, 12 yrs, 24 yrs. The deeper your relationship gets, the more He knows, the more you reveal and give over to Him, He still loves you the same.  Even after the 3rd date when you lay all your shit on the table, when you're trying to see if you can scare Him off. He still sees the rainbows and sunshine. He's staring at you across the table, asking: "Do you wanna know what I see? What I think of you, right now in this moment?"

This weekend I answered YES. And boy did I get to see. I saw how much my Lover really does love me right now. That it is constant. It doesn't grow over time. It is what it always has been and will be.

"I'm in love with God and God's in love with me. This is who I am and this is who I'll be, and that settles it. Completely." -Misty Edwards (who, btw, is amazing leading worship live)

Tuesday, August 3, 2010


I strive to seek Him. 
I'm dying to all else.
Do with me as You will. 
I demand more.
I release you from any box I've created. 
Let me not sit at the base of the mountain.
I want to see Your face. Literally. 
Reveal it to me. 
Show me the path to Your heart.
I have complete abandon. 
Prophesy over my life. 
Thank you for granting my deepest wish.