Monday, March 1, 2010
UPDATE
So this sux. Life that is. I mean, i miss jail. Which is to say that in jail there was no life. You didn't have to make decisions or be tested on anything. My proudest moment was when in a "don't shake your babies" class, i got to be the only one raising my hand saying i didn't have children. Out here my proudest moment is when I don't do that 3rd shot or drunk dial my ex, or sleep with him for that matter. I hate it out here. Pride sux. When you're so good for even, lets say hypothetically 3 weeks, or even 15 weeks, and then you crash. Why did you crash? because you f-n felt like getting trashed. You were sick of sitting there while everyone else had all the fun. And then he happened. Well since you've fallen off the wagon, why not roll around in the mud and make it a happy-fun time? Ugh... trying to climb back on the wagon, but frankly the wagon is SUPER lonely. whatever. Let's try this again, shall we? Btw, supposed to be going to AA twice a week... haven't gone yet... damnit it's cold outside and i am not walking across town just to hear other people talk about how bad it sux we don't drink anymore.
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Guess what. It's frustrating on this side too. Know what's frustrating? Hearing about the same issue over and over, when you don't do anything about it. You comment about other people, how you get sick of hearing them bitch about their life but they don't do anything about it. No different here. You don't want to be the only one not drinking? Don't hang out with people who drink. Don't go clubing and to the bars. Not that hard to understand. You say you don't want to just ditch all your friends? Well, how's that working for you? Seems to me if you want to change your lifestyle, that includes changing friends. And the whole AA thing. Wake up and smell the coffee (booze). You are one of those people! Realize it and deal with it.
ReplyDeleteI'm sry I'm being rude, but I'm tired of being hurt on this end. I bite my tongue all the time cuz I don't want to hurt you, I want to encourage you. But sometimes my pain takes over. And it will always hurt cuz I will never stop loving you.